Saturday, January 29, 2005

The Dirty End Of The Stick, by Melanie Wilber

“DEDICATED TO LAURIA LONGSTREET”


The rusty old pick-up truck choked while Gert idled for a while. With folded arms, work laid behind her back. She sat unoccupied, almost lethargic.

Under a cloud she dawdled through the watery earth to the concession stand. Crouched over the stool sat her boss, defeated eyes and untidy hair. Gert cowered next to her like a stick in the throat, awaiting the crowd to come.

Two hours later the drab ditch of the dirt paved track roared with the scent of gas and Redman. There was much excitement at the Afton raceway that night. The once wet sediment now dried danced over the cheering crowd and filtered out over the neon lights above. The cars growled and grunted in perfect synchronicity around the track while the tires spun drunk over the dirt. The crowd, crammed into the grandstand, swaggered and sung their praises to the entertainment.

Four beers and six hotdogs in the whole, Gert, the chubby faced cherub, descended from the grandstand with an empty cart. She made her way back to the concession stand for a pickup. Mud caked shoes made it hard to walk and slowed her pace even more. She was $42.00 short for the night and she had only started working two hours ago. She needed to really push if she was going to go home with some cash.

Her feet tripped and slipped while she pushed the cart over to the far end of the jeering crowded grandstand. Five or six customers later, a reeky old man came up for a Budweiser and a burger. In his inebriated best, he asked her how much. She came back with “How’s $75 sound? It took him a minute to understand what was going on. They descended into the bowels of the grandstand.

In his moth eaten flannel, he handed her a wad of cash. They stood limp in an awkward embrace. Knee deep in garbage, there was much confusion with their tongs. Crude fondling of an ungraceful caress. Musty tainted briefs below his knees, the vulgar smacking of their love making was drowned out by the polluted crowd. They were blind to the world as he dismantled her.

Inebrious kisses, he had a drop too much, for his orgasm never came. He finally gave up and fumbled with his zipper. She hobbled from the dark to have another beer and wash the rancid taste from her mouth and mind. Her clothes were not so lucky. They were oiled up with his abomination.

She had her money, some. Though the night was young, and rent was due. She gulped down another beer and crammed in two more hotdogs.

Out of the frying pan and into the fire, work dragged on.


I imagine him
Impotent as distant thunder
In those shadows I have eaten my ghostration.
I wish him dead or away.
That, it seems, is the impossibility.

That being free. What would the dark
Do without fevers to eat?
What would the light
Do without eyes to knife, what would be
Do, do, do without me?

-Sylvia Plath

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Dear bush,
Yes, your name is not in Capitals because you do not represent ourreal Capital(not the Capital on your checkinhg account)- you stupid silly little man who, yes, you did get the vote to be a president for the second time, but
"Once, twice, three times a looser, and we hate.....you!"

Too bad you had the security raised to scare people once again when the main focus was on your inauguration, so i can see how you could divert the public’s attention to Boston....
Again, you duct out of having a guy wipe that sweat from your brow- (no threat) thinking someone could actually hate your stupid actions that you justify as right-
Hitler would have laughed you off the stage - you goof

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Tinsel of my eye
Such brilliancy in your radiance.
I am deprived!

Such a grace beyond the reach of art.

Symmetrical in my mind.
Marooned!

Aesthetically picturesque.
Disinherited!

True Lovers Knot.
Tangled
i still did not correctly finnish the last blogg right. E-Git alert.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

I wanted to do this all over. I am quiting smoking and my brain is not funtioning properly....so in haste, i posted this last week without highlighting the things I have done in my life time. Thanks Jason for sending me this cool thing- all that i have done i have posted in BOLD..

html for linking back to my post about it: Bossa Nova
1. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
2. Swam with wild dolphins
3. Climbed a mountain
4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
5. Been inside the Great Pyramid
6. Held a tarantula
7. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
8. Said 'I love you' and meant it
9. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Touched an iceberg
20. Slept under the stars
21. Changed a baby's diaper
22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23. Watched a meteor shower
24. Gotten drunk on champagne
25. Given more than you can afford to charity
26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28. Had a food fight
29. Bet on a winning horse
30. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
31. Asked out a stranger
32. Had a snowball fight
33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35. Held a lamb
36. Enacted a favourite fantasy
37. Taken a midnight skinny dip
38. Taken an ice cold bath
39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40. Seen a total eclipse
41. Ridden a roller coaster
42. Hit a home run
43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45. Adopted an accent for an entire day
46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48. Had two hard drives for your computer
49. Visited all 50 states
50. Loved your job for all accounts
51. Taken care of someone who was shit-faced
52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53. Had amazing friends
54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55. Watched wild whales
56. Stolen a sign
57. Backpacked in Europe
58. Taken a road trip
59. Gone rock climbing
60. Lied to a foreign government official in that country to avoid notice
61. Midnight walk on the beach
62. Skydived
63. Visited Ireland
64. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
66. Visited Japan
67. Bench-pressed your own weight
68. Milked a cow
69. Alphabetized your records
70. Pretended to be a superhero
71. Sung karaoke
72. Lounged around in bed all day
73. Posed nude in front of strangers
74. Gone scuba diving
75. Got it on to "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye
76. Kissed in the rain
77. Played in the mud
78. Played in the rain
79. Gone to a drive-in theater
80. Done something you should regret, but don't regret it (I try not to regret anything)
81. Visited the Great Wall of China
82. Discovered that someone who's not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better
84. Started a business
85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86. Toured ancient sites
87. Taken a martial arts class
88. Swordfought for the honor of a woman
89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90. Gotten married
91. Been in a movie
92. Crashed a party
93. Loved someone you shouldn't have
94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy (good question, I don't know...)
95. Gotten divorced
96. Had sex at the office
97. Gone without food for 5 days
98. Made cookies from scratch
99. Won first prize in a costume contest
100. Ridden a gondola in Venice
101. Gotten a tattoo
102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103. Rafted the Snake River
104. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
105. Got flowers for no reason
106. Masturbated in a public place
107. Got so drunk you don't remember anything
108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug
109. Performed on stage
110. Been to Las Vegas
111. Recorded music
112. Eaten shark
113. Had a one-night stand
114. Gone to Thailand
115. Seen Siouxsie live
116. Bought a house
117. Been in a combat zone
118. Buried one/both of your parents
119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120. Been on a cruise ship
121. Spoken more than one language fluently
122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123. Bounced a cheque
124. Performed in Rocky Horror
125. Read—and understood—your credit report
126. Raised children
127. Recently bought and played with a favourite childhood toy
128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
129. Created and named your own constellation of stars
130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132. Called or written your Congressman/Member of Parliament
133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
134. —More than once? —More than thrice?
135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
137. Had an abortion or your female partner did
138. Had plastic surgery
139. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
140. Wrote articles for a large publication
141. Lost over 100 pounds
142. Held someone while they were having a flashback
143. Piloted an airplane
144. Petted a stingray
145. Broken someone's heart
146. Helped an animal give birth
147. Been fired or laid off from a job
148. Won money on a TV game show
149. Broken a bone
150. Killed a human being
151. Gone on an African photo safari
152. Ridden a motorcycle
153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph
154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157. Ridden a horse
158. Had major surgery
159. Had sex on a moving train
160. Had a snake as a pet
161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
165. Visited all 7 continents
166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167. Eaten kangaroo meat
168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169. Been a sperm or egg donor
170. Eaten sushi
171. Had your picture in the newspaper
172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
174. Gotten someone fired for their actions
175. Gone back to school
176. Parasailed
177. Changed your name
178. Petted a cockroach
179. Eaten fried green tomatoes
180. Read The Iliad
181. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read
182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183. —and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184. Taught yourself an art from scratch
185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186. Apologised to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187. Skipped all your school reunions
188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189. Been elected to public office
190. Written your own computer language
191. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193. Built your own PC from parts
194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
195. Had a booth at a street fair
196. Dyed your hair
197. Been a DJ
198. Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199. Written your own role playing game
200. Been arrested

Thursday, January 06, 2005

html for linking back to my post about it: Bossa Nova 1. Bought everyone in the pub a drink 2. Swam with wild dolphins 3. Climbed a mountain 4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive 5. Been inside the Great Pyramid 6. Held a tarantula 7. Taken a candlelit bath with someone 8. Said 'I love you' and meant it 9. Hugged a tree 10. Done a striptease 11. Bungee jumped 12. Visited Paris 13. Watched a lightning storm at sea 14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise 15. Seen the Northern Lights 16. Gone to a huge sports game 17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa 18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables 19. Touched an iceberg 20. Slept under the stars 21. Changed a baby's diaper 22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon 23. Watched a meteor shower 24. Gotten drunk on champagne 25. Given more than you can afford to charity 26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope 27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment 28. Had a food fight 29. Bet on a winning horse 30. Taken a sick day when you're not ill 31. Asked out a stranger 32. Had a snowball fight 33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier 34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can 35. Held a lamb 36. Enacted a favourite fantasy 37. Taken a midnight skinny dip 38. Taken an ice cold bath 39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar 40. Seen a total eclipse 41. Ridden a roller coaster 42. Hit a home run 43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days 44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking 45. Adopted an accent for an entire day 46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors 47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment 48. Had two hard drives for your computer 49. Visited all 50 states 50. Loved your job for all accounts 51. Taken care of someone who was shit-faced 52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied 53. Had amazing friends 54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country 55. Watched wild whales 56. Stolen a sign 57. Backpacked in Europe 58. Taken a road trip 59. Gone rock climbing 60. Lied to a foreign government official in that country to avoid notice 61. Midnight walk on the beach 62. Skydived 63. Visited Ireland 64. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love 65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them 66. Visited Japan 67. Bench-pressed your own weight 68. Milked a cow 69. Alphabetized your records 70. Pretended to be a superhero 71. Sung karaoke 72. Lounged around in bed all day 73. Posed nude in front of strangers 74. Gone scuba diving 75. Got it on to "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye 76. Kissed in the rain 77. Played in the mud 78. Played in the rain 79. Gone to a drive-in theater 80. Done something you should regret, but don't regret it (I try not to regret anything) 81. Visited the Great Wall of China 82. Discovered that someone who's not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog 83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better 84. Started a business 85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken 86. Toured ancient sites 87. Taken a martial arts class 88. Swordfought for the honor of a woman 89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight 90. Gotten married 91. Been in a movie 92. Crashed a party 93. Loved someone you shouldn't have 94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy (good question, I don't know...) 95. Gotten divorced 96. Had sex at the office 97. Gone without food for 5 days 98. Made cookies from scratch 99. Won first prize in a costume contest 100. Ridden a gondola in Venice 101. Gotten a tattoo 102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on 103. Rafted the Snake River 104. Been on television news programs as an "expert" 105. Got flowers for no reason 106. Masturbated in a public place 107. Got so drunk you don't remember anything 108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug 109. Performed on stage 110. Been to Las Vegas 111. Recorded music 112. Eaten shark 113. Had a one-night stand 114. Gone to Thailand 115. Seen Siouxsie live 116. Bought a house 117. Been in a combat zone 118. Buried one/both of your parents 119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off 120. Been on a cruise ship 121. Spoken more than one language fluently 122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone 123. Bounced a cheque124. Performed in Rocky Horror 125. Read—and understood—your credit report 126. Raised children 127. Recently bought and played with a favourite childhood toy 128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour 129. Created and named your own constellation of stars 130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country 131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did 132. Called or written your Congressman/Member of Parliament 133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over 134. —More than once? —More than thrice? 135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge 136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking 137. Had an abortion or your female partner did 138. Had plastic surgery 139. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived 140. Wrote articles for a large publication 141. Lost over 100 pounds 142. Held someone while they were having a flashback 143. Piloted an airplane 144. Petted a stingray 145. Broken someone's heart 146. Helped an animal give birth 147. Been fired or laid off from a job 148. Won money on a TV game show 149. Broken a bone 150. Killed a human being 151. Gone on an African photo safari 152. Ridden a motorcycle 153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph 154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced 155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol 156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild 157. Ridden a horse 158. Had major surgery 159. Had sex on a moving train 160. Had a snake as a pet 161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon 162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing 163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours 164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states 165. Visited all 7 continents 166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days 167. Eaten kangaroo meat 168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground 169. Been a sperm or egg donor 170. Eaten sushi 171. Had your picture in the newspaper 172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime 173. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about 174. Gotten someone fired for their actions 175. Gone back to school 176. Parasailed 177. Changed your name 178. Petted a cockroach 179. Eaten fried green tomatoes 180. Read The Iliad 181. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read 182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them 183. —and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you 184. Taught yourself an art from scratch 185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating 186. Apologised to someone years after inflicting the hurt 187. Skipped all your school reunions 188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language 189. Been elected to public office 190. Written your own computer language 191. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream 192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care 193. Built your own PC from parts 194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you 195. Had a booth at a street fair 196. Dyed your hair 197. Been a DJ 198. Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal 199. Written your own role playing game 200. Been arrested
she's a Draggle-tail of muddle, the woman gasped!
A pretty kettle of fish vexed in fermentation while the devil waits to pay.
such naughty house of tempestuous temptations
-is that your husband entering there?

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

I GET TIED UP
FROM YOUR AMBIGUOUS SMILES

I GET TIED DOWN
FROM YOUR FACETIOUS SIGHS

SWERVING-

STRAIGHTFORWARD.

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Days of memory
Eyes like silken fabric, inlaid
Pen, photogenic
Words, a requiem
Paper, naked as bleech.

Monday, January 03, 2005

I believe Im back on the map, glad no one Is listening
Indeed said the sparrow, Indeed-
for I think I choked on a seed
and my words are skipping (fill in the blank)